I've been having little bouts of anxiety lately. I don't deal well with some transitions. I don't like this about myself, but I like things planned and when there is uncertainty in my life it affects me.
When I say affects, I really mean consumes me. It makes me approach lots of things in my daily life with a different attitude than what I like. The uncertainty right now centers around what job I will be doing next year and what school I will be at. In an ideal world, I'd return to the school I previously taught at in a first grade position or in a Title I position. That is unlikely.
So I check the vacancies on the county website no less than 10 times a day. See...consumed.
But when I try not to think about it I just redirect my anxiety on other things...should I have eaten that piece of pie, how I need to sweep the floor again, how I should have pushed myself harder at the gym today, and so on.
These are NOT things that normally bother me, but when I'm anxious these thoughts just pop into my head. I just hope I get this job thing settled soon because I don't like feeling like this...it stinks.